I think you are setting yourself up for failure. Try directing all of that anger and energy towards finding a therapist that you can get along with and maybe you won't feel such a need to direct that anger towards others. I've been dealing with depression all of my life. You can blame the world or try to find answers or give up. Me, I still keep plugging away and don't expect my therapist to do all the work for me. There are lots of good therapists out there. Just like there are lots of support groups, and sexual abuse support groups that include men. I know from experience, and I'm sure Tennessee is not all that different than missouri. So good luck to you and hope to hear from you again cause this place is pretty great too.