I wanted to add one thing about delusions/paranoia. When she says something that you think is a delusion or paranoid which she seems to be expressing quite alot. You can be supportive without agreeing. Like for example if she thinks her room is bugged, instead of saying "it's not" or "maybe it's not" you could try to reflect some feelings back. I mean if you thought your room was bugged how would you feel? You would probably be scared right? It's important to support "i'm sorry you feel like that, it must be really scary" but equally important is making sure if she asks you, that you don't just agree with her delusion. I mean make sure if she asks she knows that it's not reality, meaning you don't think her room is bugged but...you are understanding how she feels about her "room being bugged". In my experience people are a whole lot easier to have a relationship with if you can offer supporting statements, because any time you challenge they get defensive, and anytime you agree for the sake of not fighting your not being honest, neither of which are a great position to be in.

Getting help for yourself is excellent, I'm really glad your going to be taking that step. I hope things get easier for you and that your able to have a relationship with your daughter, you seem to be a really caring person, not may people would do the research, even come on forums looking for help, that speaks volumes about you.

Best of luck,
Tina