I know you said you work for a small company, but how small? It's not usually a good idea to share too much personal info with work people - no matter how close you think you are to them, they will change the way they look at you. You may think you're indispensible, but in reality, no matter how harsh, you are not - I learned that the hard way. I definitely echo the others' suggestion of therapy,taking walks/breaks
but I would definitely recommend to stop sharing and set some boundaries at work. If you are in a position of leadership you need to be respected - it's hard to get that if you are in such a state.

I know you said you're a programmer - do ou have the flexibility to do some work from home, or flex your hours so that you can have a little bit of an easier schedule?

What i am learning is that if you don't take care of yourself, you can't do anything else effectively. Take care of yourself.