Oh god I can't stand being in this apartment with HER. the ex. It is so wrong and weird and depressing. I keep looking at my wrists ad then looking at my blade and then at my wrists and I can't stop thinking about it.
I know it's a ridiculous reason to feel this way, wh get o worked up over someone who didn't even care anyway?

See, all I asked her to do was show me a little more care and affection, be gentle with me, try to learn my illness. And she says we have to break up.

Great frigging timing. And now all I think about is hurting myself more, making myself so ragged and scarred that I'm hospitalised.

But i drink and take painkillers. I guess that is self harm too, but it stops me doing something worse, something more final.