There have been problems for a while.
Actually since before we got married, which was only last April.

I have gotten to the point where i just say "ok" or "yes" so I don't have to argue with him.

he has said some very mean things to me about me being so stupid, about me being fat, about how I shouldn't be able to walk on the same earth as him....sometimes i don't think he realizes how insensitive he is. Other times i know he knows, but he just doesn't care.

i know the signs of being in an abusive relationship - he is not physically abusive but i think he is emotionally.

in the past few weeks it's gotten worse - i told him a few weeks ago if it didn't get better I would leave him. He kept talking about how he can't change what he did in the past and i just told him i want him to change how he behaves in the future.

It seemed like it was getting better. I sent him a bunch of stuff about depression and stuff for family members of people with depression to help him which I thought he read...stupid me....but he seemed like he was treating me so much better....

but of course he went back to his usual ways....no patience...saying hurtful things....when I asked him if he'd read the information he said it was too much stuff so he'd get back to it later.

Meanwhile I'm going through a huge work crisis, where i will probably quit my job, and could really use his support, to just hug me and tell me it will be ok, and he can't even manage that.

This weekend it really came to a head - i won't get into specifics because this is long already but it came down to me saying i would leave and calliing my friend hysterical.

Then when he heard me on the phone he got upset that I was saying bad things about him and said he wanted to try again - he hates seeing me cry. And that he'd even go to my therapist with me.

Now this morning he's leaving for the day....and told me he's cancelling my gym membership since i haven't been going (which has been a sore subject for us) and separating our cell phone accounts "just in case".

He says he's in a good mood and just wants to live a happy life. He misses the happy person i used to be.

i'm just so sad because I know I have to leave and it just seems so overwhelming with my job situation going on too.
my parents have no idea that we've had any problems - this is my second marriage and i feel like such a failure.