Hi, I'm a first-timer here, but I was diagnosed with adhd last fall.

Since finding out about myself, I've done extensive and fairly rigorous reading, and am actually doing a project on adhd already.

I have gazillions of questions, but I'd like to start with this: How do I approach my sister about her nine-year-old daughter, both of whom I'm certain have adhd? (My sis has already taken a couple of the online self-tests I sent her, and agrees she's prob'ly adhd.)

My mom is even more adhd than I am, and has been learning about the disorder vicariously through my diagnosis, treatment and research. But my sis very much does not want to have anything to do with the idea that her daughter is adhd -- though I suspect the disorder (along with her "giftedness") is at the heart of the girl's severely limited socialization and her increasing ostracism at school, as well as her problematic behavior at home. My sis was one of those kids who was tormented while in school, and ended up acting out in seriously inappropriate ways (not quite Columbine-level violence, but not all that far from that either). Sis has never been ambitious in terms of self-reflection or self-help, and I'm afraid that because she hasn't truly learned from her experience, her daughter will be doomed to repeat it.

What can I do? Please give me concrete suggestions.

I'm aware that "butting in" and being "bossy" is part of my adhd-ness, but how much butting in is too much?

Thanks!