sj,

I know what you're saying.

One of the things that held me back in the depression was the hope that it would go away. I would constantly look for all sorts of signs that it would lift, any kind of renewal. New Year was one, but there would be things every day, many times a day even.

In the end we just know that we are ill and that's the story for us. But, in a funny way this helped me. Instead of constantly hoping for relief I started to train myself to be able to feel bad, and then see what could achieve while that feeling is still going on. It's not easy, but it works most of the time for me.

Good thoughts, M