BP, it sounds to me like there must be something in your life that you are shutting off, and that's causing all of your feeling to be shut off to keep it out. I don't know what that is, but hurting yourself isn't going to bring back your ability to feel. You're going to need to work with your T and find out what is scaring you so badly, and see what you can do to address that. I know it's easier said than done, but we're here with you and will continue to support you and care about you.

Rap