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With my last 2 Ts, every time I have mentioned a book, movie, TV or radio show they each said they haven't read/seen/heard it. Or if they read it it's like, "Oh, I think I read that a long time ago but I'm not sure." I get the distinct feeling that they don't want to open up in this way and in each case they wanted me to share my feelings first without sharing their own view(s). Now I kind of feel like I expect it when I mention a show I think, "No, I didn't think you had..." There is the possibility they had seen it, but it's happened enough now that I think its a white lie for my own therapeutic benefit.
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My T does exactly the same thing. I also decided it was just a therapeutic technique.
'A long time ago.' Exactly.
I don't think she lies, exactly, but I think she 'shapes' things. I think she balances things -- I think she says what's true, but very carefully. I think she only tells me what she thinks is therapeutically useful. I think she omits a lot.
I used to think that she lied, and it infuriated me. But I guess I don't think that any more.
'A long time ago.' Exactly when is that? It could be anything! A month, a year, ten years. Like I say, she doesn't lie. But she's careful.