Quote:
Originally Posted by sanityseeker
"Self-love, my liege, in not so vile a sin, as self-neglecting." William Shakespeare
"I celebrate myself, and sing myself." Walt Witman
"To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance." Oscar Wilde
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Thanks for these great quotes. Self-loathing is one of my strong suits and I really appreciate these literary reminders that compassion needs to start at home.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sanityseeker
I am not sure now if I shared this but I am learning that if, before I automatically assume I can't do something because I always do, because I am too afraid of the consequences (melt down, embarrassment, rejection....), I take a moment to ask myself if my fear has any basis in fact. Each and every time I face a challenge not to avoid, I now ask myself if I stilll feel it is necessary or if maybe I can venture out after all. I am free to say 'Nope, not ready." or "Maybe I can do some of what I am avoiding so I will venture that far out" or even "Yea I think I am up for this today." The lesson for me as been to trust I am on the road to recovery and what was necessary yesterday to keep me safe may not be necessary today. By checking in with myself I am allowing healing to come into my life, one step, one day at a time.
An example is when a few weeks back my uncle passed away and I had to decide if I was up for going to the funeral and mixing with all the people at the reception. I really wanted to support my father even though he said he would understand if I wasn't up for it. When I asked myself if I could do the funeral I decided, yes, I could do that much because I knew the graveside service was family only. Then I asked myself about the reception. Not so sure about that because I knew there would be a lot of people and the volume was likely to be pretty high. I decided maybe I could do that but I would wait to decide for sure after the funeral. I ended up going but when symptoms of anxiety and hypersensitivity started acting up I said my good byes. I sat in the truck for a while re-centering myself by focus on my breath and getting a grip on the anxiety that had started to build. On the drive home I rejoice in the fact that I did something I normally-habitually would avoid and nothing horrible happened.
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Wow! This is really inspiring to read ((((((ss))))))) Well done! Well done!!!!! I love how you managed to do something that part of you wanted to avoid. And I love how you took such good care of yourself while you were doing it. Awesome stuff! I can remember how good it feels after doing something like that (I haven't managed it in a while).
Thanks so much for sharing that
Quote:
Originally Posted by sanityseeker
I won't sing if others are around. I know where it comes from. I was told by my 4th grade teacher not to sing so load and again when I was in a highschool play I was told to not sing so load because I couldn't sing. It was so hurtful because both times I was feeling so much joy and happiness from the singing. I was crushed into silence by their rebuke of me.
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That makes me feel really sad. I'm so sorry your teacher was so thoughtless and insensitive (((((ss))))))