I'm sorry you have so much pain to deal with.
It's understandable for your wife to have trouble dealing with or understanding or wanting to understand these things. My husband grew up in a fairly normal, stable emotional environment too and hasn't had to deal with traumatic memories or mood disorders or mental issues in his family or for himself, so it's difficult for him to really relate to my struggles, my pain, my troubles with my thoughts and moods. It's hard for him to take in.Even though he doesn't understand, he wants to try though, and he wants to support me and stand with me and keep loving me. I get the impression your wife loves you and wants to stand with you too and support you....maybe you aren't as much of a burden to her as you feel!
One thing that helped my husband see things better was to come with me to a therapy session and my T was a huge help in explaining some things to him. It was a painful shock for him to see parts of me, to see a greater extent of my pain and my mental/emotional struggles than he had seen or suspected, but he said it was worth it to gain more understanding. He's been more gentle and supportive since....
Maybe something like this would help you and your wife in your situation too.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know I was thinking of you and offering you support and care!