BD, I'm sorry that you are hurt. What this doesn't tell us is why you are upset, or what we can do to help you. I used to think that SI, and talking about SI, was the most effective way to express how I was feeling when I was hurt inside, but I'm finding out that it doesn't really say how we feel. You used words to tell us about hurting yourself. Words are good for a lot more too, although it can be tricky to find the right ones to say what you need to say. It's even hard to know what it is that you need to say.