Dark,
I'm sorry things are so tumultuous and convoluted at the moment. I can sense how angry you are now. I wish I could help you answer those questions; we both know I can't. Though I know I am only an online friend, I am your friend.

I've enjoyed talking with you when I've had the chance, and you've always proved a kind, patient, caring person with a keen sense of humor and possessing more generosity than I think you are aware. I mean none of this in a patronizing sense; it's all extended in sincerity and of course, friendship.
You are welcome to PM me whenever you like, but you already know that. Please take care of yourself and reach out whenever you want or need. My heart goes out to you, Dark. I AM your friend.