I am stuck on this roller coaster that won't let me off. I want to be done with this. Before I lay down, my final words to myself are - please don't let me wake up. I really want to be well for my children, but I am losing the battle. Every step I take forward seems to send me flying a million miles back. The feelings are destroying me, maybe I never should have opened this pandorahs box... T tomorrow, can I admit to him how much pain I'm in, can I tell him I failed and SI'd again, can I tell him my son still needs me but I'm drowning here?????
I just want one day, one day with no negative thoughts, one day where I feel strong, one day where it doesn't hurt to be alive.

Just one day....