I'm having a horrible day.

I SIed with a steak knife a couple of days ago, and as a result my brother locked up my medication while he went out for the night, for fear that I would OD. (Of course, I was able to take out enough meds to last me the night and next morning)

He PROMISED to come back to school the next day, so he could take my meds out again, but his alarm messed up, and he missed the bus. He's in a rural area right now, so he can't get back to school until tomorrow morning. I NEED my meds each time, or else I turn into a twitchy nervous wreck.

Now I'm forced to go to the hospital, to ask if I can have just enough meds to last until he gets back. The hospital triggers me LOTS, because of past hospitalizations on the psychiatric floor. I feel like crying, screaming, throwing things, falling into a permanent sleep... I don't want to go but I know I need to.

I guess I just wanted to get all of this out there, so somebody could listen.