sj..... right now I just feel like a hopeless case. I don't know what can help me. I feel I have no control over my brain. I am so tired of this depression and the thoughts of what I have to do.... like call the doc for help again. I am on meds already but don't think they're helping. I just can't seem to pick up that phone to make the right calls..... Also going to go thru something with my T and maybe it's necessary but sometimes I wonder if this is right!!! All the digging into the past, all the thinking. I don't want to go thru this anymore. I want to go off the meds, take control of my own mind and body. But I can't do that either since I was suicidal... I should really appreciate life but I can't. Something is taking over my mind!
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