I am sorry you are feeling like you are terrible, but I really don't understand the logic.

That he doesn't want to talk to you anymore? Ok. So HE doesn't. Sounds like a terrible boyfriend. Right?

And dreaming of him kissing you, well you are connected to him. You think about him, you feel, you miss him... Again, terrible?

But I understand that that's how you feel, whether it makes sense of not. And I am very sorry you feel that way. I wish you could look at it though and realize, that you do not deserve it. This is happening, but not because you are terrible. And it's a double whammy. Not only it's bad in itself but it makes you feel terrible about yourself.

You need some loving and some hugging right now, sweet girl, and I am afraid that the only person you relied on just left you high and dry. Can you love yourself, hug yourself, let yourself cry even and be gentle with yourself? Because THAT is what you deserve, and I am soo sorry you are not getting it.
HUGS