I hardly know what to say. SS I so deeply am grateful for that amazing post you wrote. what a journey. Thank you so much for writing about it. In doing so you inspire and also give permission to be open and honest. What a thread !!!!

Sun, the stages you talked about in the book "Buddha's Brain by Rick Hanson" sound excatly correct to me. I think that in a way the stage we are at is not as important as the fact that we are willing to walk through this journey. thank you for posting the stages and the name of the book. How amazing this thread is. How wonderful you are !!!

Laviee, I too have an inner brat. Okay, many years ago I named her the "wild child". And she is replete with tremendous amounts of resistance. And lots of strength.... well fear. I guess fear is not true strength at all. But rather absence of it.

Today I have been trying to be more present. Of course in trying, I do so. Also I have tried something different for the panic attacks. I am putting a gold bubble around me. Anchored into the ground. And of course breathing.

I wish I could respond to much more that was written. Suffice to say, I am grateful for all your words. Everyone !!! This thread is a treasure for me. Thank you, all.

Late addition to this post, I had to laugh at the oddity of sitting there on facebook waiting for someone to post an interesting tree in farmville ( yes, I do play farmville ) and seeing, interspersed on my feed, posts from Thch Nhat Hahs people. I had to laugh. Farmville posts and Thch Nhat Hanh. I suppose thats the ultimate in contradition