I realized that, I am alone. I have no one. Everyone kept telling me that I can talk to them. That they all want to help. But, when I finally do talk to them, they tell me that I just need to forget it all. That feeling that way over it was me being overly dramatic and for me to ignore all that, all my feelings, and just focus on school. Do school and do work and ignore everything.
That is what I have been doing the past nine years. It all bottled up. It all caught up to me. It was drowning me and I just couldn't handle it anymore. It was like the water has been slowly rising for the past nine years. More rapidly in the recent years. Finally it got so high that I couldn't escape it. I was drowning and no one cared.
God, my family actually believed that I did it all for their attention. Honestly, I have been trying to get away from them. Away from it all. I am just so tired. The only thing giving me hope is my love. In a few short months, I will be with my love. That is the only thing keeping me going right now.