(((((((lavie)))))))
Big hugs to you. We are here for you, dear friend
I really agree with what missbelle writes here. Acceptance of what is doesn't mean that we shouldn't try and make some changes where necessary. In fact, I think that is all part of the bigger picture of acceptance: in other words, accepting that we DO need to make changes.
That's actually the thing I personally struggle with the most. I've become terrified of any kind of change. Even small deviations from my daily routine frighten me. I know I need to make some changes but I don't believe I'm capable. I guess that's another part of the bigger picture of acceptance: accepting that we ARE indeed capable of change.
You are so strong (((((((lavie)))))))) and I have every faith in your ability to change. I wish many great opportunities for you! Please know that I'm thinking of you and sending you metta.