and i should also say...

that i did appreciate that some people would likely respond to what i had to say with distress...

but that i also appreciated that some other people would likely respond to what i had to say with 'oh phew i'm not all alone and crazy at that for having had similar thoughts myself'

and that was the case.

it was those latter people who my posts were for.

but that being said i'm sorry i hurt people. i don't like doing that...

if there was a way to minimise hurt responses...
and maximise freedom of speech i would be all ears...

but...

how much one can say...

sigh.

we shall see.