It seems to me that I must not be overtly dysfunctional to warrant my friends' attention.

My friends' must either feel that I'm somehow 'above' them or am not worthy of their time and effort because I'm not as openly flawed (and worse I'm not demonstrative as being flawed). And I'm intolerant towards others treating me like a lesser person if and only if they have an unrealistic representation of me.

Most of my friends act as if I'm their father (even if I'm younger than them!).

It also seems that having a definable human emotion is BAD too. To be truly concerned. To build upon the relationships I have. To have perhaps two...perhaps even three...emotions at once.

Yet I notice that others do pay me attention if I act as if I'm some sick animal. Which I'd prefer not to do. But I feel that's rather pathetic and speaks to their own psychological problems and issues.

Perhaps it's my friends age. Or our culture and society. I don't know because I feel terribly lonely so often even though I do my best to interact and engage with others. And I want to slowly but surely break free from this. Yet I notice that I find it difficult to be satisfied with most interpersonal relationships...