Peaches,
have you heard of EMDR? It's kinda a way of rewiring your brain so that the trauma you've experienced isn't so traumatic... I've been in many different kinds of therapies (including Dbt) many different therapists... Tried many self help books and workbooks as well. I'm in the process of preparing to start EMDR. It might be helpful to you as well. It's supposed to speed up healing, that's what I'm most looking forward to, if this works for me.