Thank you Sun. The ceremony was very healing and comforting. Just being able to get out of my head and stop the garbage talk for awhile was a blessing. I sometimes incorporate it into my meditation but it is different from when I am in search of healing and comfort.

I am feeling better about my rash. Pretty certain it is eczyma so as irritating as it maybe I am relieved it is likely no more serious than that. I will see the doctor on Friday and discuss it and some of the other symptoms that I am having since increasing the Lamictal. This kind of stuff is still a major trigger point for me. I am always in armed combat with strong urges to flee and hide. I don't want to go there this time. I can't go back to square one again.

I was pretty warn out by late afternoon from the morning's drama. I picked up my boy from school to take him to the gym and by the time I got home I was just looking to lay down for awhile. Remembering the last time I wanted to take a nape because I was beat from drama, I thought okay maybe I will try to walk a bit and take in some fresh air.

I managed to get around the block while doing some focused breathing. While I felt a little more even kealed I was still very tired. I had an appointment for a much needed hair cut within an hour so I decided to go ahead and lay down for awhile. I must have dozed off because one minute I look at the clock and it is 5minutes passed the hour. I thought, 'okay, another ten minutes'. The next thing I knew 30 minutes had passed and I ended up being 15 minutes late. A rude awaking to say the least. Didn't even get a chance to change my knock about clothes. But I am happy with my hair cut. It always makes me feel better.

Slow and easy night tonight. I plan to sit for awhile again before bed... for how long will depend on whether I start to doze off again.

That reminds me.... a strange but actually cool thing happened during my sit last night. I keep yawning. It was like a tired yawn but something different. But I went with it anyways. Each yawn became the inhale and the letting out was the exhale. lol... I am so sensitive to yawns just typing the word makes me do it..... there I go again .... I just did again.

Anyway I just thought that was the oddest thing. Even more so to discover it wasn't any kind of distraction but an aid to breathing more deeply.

I am persisting to type here even though I can't seem to not make mistakes that I have to backspace all the time to try again. Its only a little bit irritating!