>think I'm supposed to follow what people tell me to do to help myself to make other people feel better.

no.

you are supposed to follow what people tell you to do to help yourself (when they have valid points about what has helped you in the past and thus what is likely to help you in the future) IN ORDER TO HELP YOURSELF.

period.

like what i was saying about how when someone is drowning...

'i'm drowning i'm drowning what can i do? everything is hopeless'

and people yell at you from the sidelines

'grab the flotation device that is right in front of your face'

(ie your medication which helped you immensely last time you took it according to your doctors directions)

and you will not

but persist in yelling 'help me help me'

and nobody can rush in to the water and haul you out.
or if they did...
there would only be a next time and a next time and a next time
so in rushing in to rescue you they wouldn't be doing you any favours long term.

you need to learn to swim

people are telling you to grab the flotation device is all.

they aren't trying to manipulate you against your will in order to do something that they want for their own egotistical ends

they are trying to give you what it is that you want...

a way to swim.

yeah.

it is going to be hard work from you.

meds help.
you could hunt through the archives of the site that must not be named and this one. you could work out the dates you were taking your meds as directed. you could see for yourself.

have you done this?

have you done this BEFORE disregarding what other people have said about how much the meds have helped you?

of course... i think the meds... well... they help the water be a little shallower or something like that... so you can rebound yourself off the bottom for air...

therapy would help you swim...

but yeah.

that is going to require you actively seeking that...
making phone calls...
going into buildings...

therapy will help you with those things...

but of course...

you are going to have to do them to get therapy.

it is your decision of course.

but people on the sidelines will feel frustrated in response to your not grabbing that flotation device.

they will.

i think... that will be a fairly inevitable response from people who care about you and who want you to get better.

its not about doing what people say just because they say...

its about if you really want to stop drowning...

then you are going to have to learn to swim.

you are.