Many thanks, T-bone 6074 and The Byzantine, for your replies. The members here do indeed seem like a kind, wise, and helpful group.

Perhaps I'm not giving my husband enough credit. I'm sure it's been hell for him for the last 10 to 12 years. I suppose he rightfully could have bailed out years ago. (Ironically, he's from NJ too, T-bone, although now we live several states away.)

Thanks to all for letting me rant....It's hard to keep this stuff in all the time.