Paige, I think you hit it well, but now that it has been 3 weeks since the last time that I have SI'ed, I'm still lost on this. I don't know how to express what I feel like I need to. My T also gave this assignment, and I don't know where to begin...

Write something to your future self.

I dread even thinking about it. I want control, and the future is so out of control to me.. In a way, Doing the assignment, I know that it will be hard, and I don't know how to cope with these feelings of loss of control. In a way I hate the future... I just can't come to terms with it....

What else can I do instead of SI???? but will still give the same emotional release???