It didn't even get to sex. Just thinking if I could go back in time and stop myself from ever questioning how everything was and what we stood for I would do it in a heart beat. Just thinking about him, makes me wanna cry and I can't even see a red jeep without thinking it might be him and feeling my heart sink.

I finally got everything off my chest and I told him how I feel, and blah blah. He said he was glad I told him, but I knew things would change but I don't know, just being stupid. I kept hope I wouldn't see him but at the same time that I would just as an excuse to talk to him... He was supposed to help me with my math, as he promised he would yesterday night, I texted him earlier and I couldn't even get a straight answer, like he felt uncomfortable to even text me...
He's a senior so he'll be gone by the end of April... ugh what a mess >_<