Spaceid I do not know alot about any details of your relationship but I can only speak from my own experience. I have learned that if you are insecure in your relationship it is usually because you have other insecurities in your life. Until you work on that and you can feel secure in yourself it is difficult having any healthy relationships with anybody. Hope some way you can find a way to work on feeling secure about yourself then the othe is alot easier. Hope this is helpful, and hope you are able to work this out, living the way you are I know is miserable.Take care of You first.
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