You've been assaulted? Let me tell you - it's NEVER your fault!
I've been assaulted twice. Once by someone I knew and the second was random and was robbed after. The first time was 20 years ago, and the second time was 17 years ago.
It does get better, but never really goes away. But you have to - HAVE to stop blaming yourself. You don't deserve what happened! You didn't cause it.
I am here if you need me. I can empathize.