Thanks for reaching out for help on here. I agree with others that you don't need to be so hard on yourself. I've been through times like that before and thought I was a failure, but you are not a failure. You are struggling with depression --which is a real and serious condition.

See if your college has a counseling center and call and get help. many times they can help students to get in to see a doctor or whatever you need. Focus on taking care of yourself.