Your letter to T was skillfully written and very heartfelt. It was very clear and I could feel your fear as you described it to your T. I agree with Tatyana2009- there is some very valuable informatin in there, and your writing it out may be the only way you can get to it for now. Asking her to accept this effort in trying to communicate something that is VERY difficult for you to say is perfectly ok too.

Are you willing to discuss this letter with your T after she gets it in the email? If so, then I would suggest adding that you'd be willing to do so in your next sesson and could she please let you know that she received it- then you don't have to worry about it again.

I sent my T an email last week and she was very sweet about it. I think it was ok because I revealed some very deep feelings like you have. She did not shame me for sending it or make me feel like I did something wrong. Ya know what she did? She wrote a little note back saying that she appreciated the email and could see that it was very difficult for me to write. She also acknowledged how scarey it was for me to write it and send to her- She said that because I told her I was frightened in the email. She was wonderful- and really appreciated my effort in trying to share my feelings with her. I think your T can be this way too.

You are trying sooooo hard to reach out- and I think your T will see that and hopefully acknowledge that. I think it would be good if you sent it. Like WePow would say...... You deserve to have a voice and have it heard too!