I don't want to wake up in the morning that is how miserable i am. I don't want to get out of bed and haven't, except to use bathroom and get food and drink. I haven't been outdoors since last Monday. I need things from store and i need to do laundry. My bf gets certain things from store for me but he won't do a big shopping. He works and commutes and he's tired i don't like to ask him to help all the time when i'm home doing nothing. But i feel like i have been drugged or like i've lost a lot of blood or something, i feel so tired and weak. I've been crying, irritable and just wish God would let me die. I missed my therapist appt because i couldn't get up and out. I also am not feeling physically well. Going to therapy doesn't help anyway. She tries but i don't feel anyone can help me. I have messed up my life so much and i don't learn from mistakes. Now i'm in this horrible depression and I have no hope of ever getting better. This is no way to live. I am so miserable. I just needed to vent. Thanks,

Anjel