i can relate to all of this. not sure what the best decision to make is.
but, be gentle with yourself,....therapy is a process and its O.K. that you're unsure of things still... sometimes I wonder how long it will take till we know the right thing to do, the best answer and then other times I wonder if thats not what life is about...its more about the quest, the answers might come along with the ride but, the quest is the only thing that is guaranteed. if that didnt make much sense I'm sorry, I started thinking critically about some things when I began this post. the point is, I hope everything works out but, I don't think you should feel bad for how you felt...it sounds normal and part of how therapy works.