My psychiatrist does some psychotherapy with me and it's really ineffective and I've expressed concern that he should stop. All he wants are quick fixes. I understand that this comes from him wanting me to be well, but I've been through a lot and I deserve the time to heal. So this ends in him pushing me to do stuff I don't want to.

Yesterday he told me that I am 23 and most people my age are going to movies, going out on dates and going out with their friends and that I SHOULD too. But I'm not into that stuff. I haven't been to a movie theatre in 4 or 5 years and if going out with my friends involves "bars" like my friends do, then I'm not into that either. I'm very artsy and I'm sort of a loner. I would appreciate for him to tell me express myself in those ways. Go to an art class or join a book club. Something more quiet and reserved. I didn't really think of all this till after the session or I would have told him how I felt. Although I have told him in the past with other things.

He'll tell me things like "you need to move from your apartment, because it's too isolated, move into town, so you can do more". I'll tell him that even if I moved into town I would just be more scared to walk outside. That me and my dog have fun where we live and we don't need to be in the middle of a large town. That just because a majority of the society likes it doesn't mean I am comfortable with it. I like it here. But he'll continue on about how that's part of my problem and we need to fix it.

It's like he's not listening at all and doesn't really want to. After every hour I spend with him I come home much more upset then I was before, because he's attempting to control me in some way. I don't need him to counsel me, because I do have a therapist. But am I allowed to just not talk when he asks me questions? Wouldn't that make me look like a brat? Like he's my psychiatrist and OF COURSE I have to trust him he signed the hippocratic oath. And if I told anyone otherwise they'd label me unruly or "lacking trust". I used to not talk all the time to psychiatrists and some would become very angry about it. One even stood up and screamed at me "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? DIDN'T MOMMY SPOON FEED YOU ENOUGH!?"