Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah
Squiggle, maybe you are still fighting having the feelings and this is what your T is talking about?
If I describe something that made me upset I can talk about it with emotion or without emotion. If I talk about it with emotion my voice might crack, I might get teary or my body might move about a lot. I do this often in therapy, so I do not understand why she keeps saying I am not FEELING anything. If I am distancing myself from my feelings I will talk about this upsetting incident as if I am explaining how I'm going to clean the floor. I have done this before as well. I questioned why I could talk about something so upsetting and be without any emotion at all.
When you talked about crying in her office and pacing about, is this new or something that you don't do very often? It is somewhat new for therapy sessions. I didn't realize until a few months ago that it was OKAY to get off the couch and do whatever I needed to do while in a session. I move around alot now. I don't think I ever stay in one place when we have sessions. She interprets this as my way to calm the anxiety of getting too close to my emotions and feelings.
And maybe your T is talking about the all or nothing approach? You appear cool and collected and then you go in the garage and start pounding? At home I can be very emotional, but in public, I am not. I wouldn't show anger in public. I save that for when I am in the privacy of my own home.
|
I don't really know what she expects me to do. Break down in a total melt down/crying spell? I have done this several times. I can't see myself doing that everytime I go in.
It seems that expressing '
feelings' is the big issue for most therapists to get out of a client. Many people are not the emotional type. I was not raised in that type of environment. We were a happy family, but we didn't get sappy and overly excited about things.
If Publisher's Clearing House knocked on my door and told me I won a million dollars, I would not scream and jump up and down in hysteria. I would be calm about it. When they left, I would probably run around my house screaming and acting a fool!
I don't think you can change that part of yourself. I will never be one who expresses intense emotions in front of people.