I'm into genealogy and think of my ancestors a lot too.

We can think whatever we like by just continually changing the "subject". That's why your talking to relatives that have died or god or other ways of helping yourself, do help you; you have subtly changed the subject of what you are thinking!

I help myself most by reading books; mostly fantasy. The situations and problems the usually young people get in and out of parallel my own thoughts and problems with myself and get me thinking of "other" things than whatever I'm obsessing, ruminating, brooding, worrying about.