Squiggle, I SO understand what you're talking about. When I first starting seeing T, I told her that everything I say will be a lie. Not that I would deliberately be telling untruths but that I know enough about how the mind works that I know I cannot trust it at all.

In "The Book of Mirdad" by Mikhail Naimy, it is written that "Speech is at best an honest lie." I told my T that my memory is poor, that I will remember just a part of the story, that my memory will be distorted, that it will have changed with time, that my emotions and thoughts will have filtered out most of the 'truth' of the story.

It's like that parable of the 3 blind men and the elephant. The reality depends on where we are looking.

So, should we be digging up stuff from the past? Or from the inner recesses of our minds? That is a question I keep asking T. I question whether I should be participating in the 'process'. I also keep asking myself if I'm being overly dramatic.
Am I embellishing stuff just because it keeps me feeling alive? Am I being creative in my story? Am I descending into fantasy?

Is it possible that I'm so in love with myself that I just want to keep talking because it's the best entertainment around? Do I want the attention? Do I revel in my self-absorption?

Lately, I also have felt that I'm losing my mind.