I never really thought about it before, but I've been doing a lot of thinking on it lately...why do I want so badly to speak about this condition so candidly, when I'm not even remotely comfortable doing so?

I believe that most of us so diagnosed are used to the idea of being looked at askew whenever the S word comes up (in any context), and paranoia - one of the nastier symptoms of it - doesn't help matters at all. At the same time, I feel it needs discussing. Not just for my sake, but for the substantial number of folks who can't (or won't) speak up about it, for the aforementioned reasons. As much as it discomfits me to write so plainly about how I think, feel or act, it is my hope that doing so will be helpful to everyone so afflicted.

I've been tossing around the idea of writing a short book on the subject, attempting to explain how SA affects me, from a personal perspective. I can't imagine it's easy to grasp for those who don't have to live with it, but maybe doing this will help not only them, but others like myself who really want help - who really want to be understood - but don't want to put themselves out there to be crucified for it. If even one person is helped by it, then the effort would be worth it to me.