Dear CO, oh yeh, I remember going through becoming aware of my inner talk. . . then changing the negative put downstuff to more positive affirmations. Great place to start healing, awareness. You are entering what is called cognitive therapy.
Awareness therapy. A thing is changed by being seen. Choices open where none had existed before....... it's exciting to get to know yourself from this "just notice" perspective. To learn to take the judgments off and just look at the peices that turn up like a puzzle. The mystery that is you waiting to be discovered. How it all has fitted together. How it can fit together once you can see the pieces.

The other concept I would like to toss your way is: have you ever forgiven yourself for choosing such a hard life? Reincarnationally speaking? Like up there on the other side we decide some of what we are to work on in this next life. Then we get down here and forget that agreement and stumble around with free will. Folks cop out on the agreement and continue harmful patterns established long before memory kicks in in this life. Becoming aware of our
patterns is the key to untangling the mess we find ourselves in....... forgiving ourselves for finding ourselves in a mess is a nice first gift to give oneself when opening to the vulnerability of truth. "Life is a great adventure, or nothing", Helen Keller. Happy travels, and Welcome to PC. Hope I didn't go to California woowoo on ya.