Man, I doubt anyone's noticed but i have been away for like...some something days....can't remember the number. ^^ But that's not really the point to this board, the point is THE. REASONING. BEHIND. WHY. I. WAS. GONE! *Bangs mallet on table after each pause*

Voice In My Head- She's really having fun with this. -.-

^^ Yep! Anyways! First off I had my first panic attack. ^^ Which isn't good...really I'm mostly just happy it's over. And the reason I am proud of myself is because I managed to get through it without having to run to someone crying. What happened I think was a friend I met online mentioned a way to find out a persons address (I don't think he was serious now that I think of it) and I just panicked. Everything started to hurt, I was shaking all over and I just kept running around sometimes just running in a blind frenzied circle and other times putting up the best security possible on my computer and other things. Luckily I started to read a manga (Full Moon Wo Sagashite, I highly recommend it!) and it calmed me down enough so that I could take some sort of medicine to get rid of my headache and go to sleep. Now this is proof that I really should see a doctor or something lest it gets worse.
(Also I have wanted to know, if you are diagnosed with ADD, OCD, or just plain anxiety *What I am thought to have* will it affect the jobs you can or can't get when I get out of college?)

But it doesn't end there! Oh no! I still refused to come online and talk to people (Hence why I wasn't here) and heck for a little bit I didn't come online at all. But slowly I adjsuted to my own pattern (With a few changes) and now am almost back in full online throttle. ^^ I still need to get up the guts to go back and talk to my friend but that's about it. I think I can handle it.

I discovered this thing on my tv that let's me buy tv programs, and I got this excercise programs that specializes in Ballet! =D It's really hard and my legs hurt like hell, but I can feel myself getting stronger and it's just relaxing. When you're doing ballet you need to make sure to keep your posture strraight, head up, and still do the moves and that doesn't leave much space for worrying. It's really fun. I might start taking lessons next month if I can.

And that is about it! *Hugs everyone who read this far* (You must have a lot of patience for hyper people huh?) I don't think this post made very much sense. I just wanted to tell someone. Arigato for listening.

Love Jen