I understand that in ways it isn't quite "fair" but the birthday dinner I mean is literally just myself, my father, and my brother usually. It's not a party and I don't get any presents and I don't invite anyone. Even my aunt who lives with them isn't coming.

I don't know how to explain this without sounding like a spoiled child who isn't getting her way. I could put up with it if my whole family was coming but they aren't. I could put up with it if they wanted to take me out on their own time, but that's not the case. It's a quiet celebration between my father and I where we do one expensive thing together out of the year and relax and enjoy ourselves. I won't relax if he's there, and my father who deserves this day more than I, is just simply going to dread the evening if her boyfriend comes. Their relationship sucks, because boyfriend has accused my Dad of not letting me see my mother when it's always been my decision, and "brainwashing" me into disliking her or other nonsense such as that.