I was sooo stressed about going to my session today, because I was still embarrassed and anxious about the change in routine (where my T had stopped walking me to the door) and our phone conversation about it earlier this week.

She told me again that it was not a rejection. I told her that when she walked me to the door, that I felt acceptance, a connection with her, and support from her. When she didn't I felt like she was taking all that away. My T told me that she'd thought about her change in behavior and she thinks that the reason she changed is that she felt our relationship had shifted, it was less formal and stilted, more casual and comfortable. That completely surprised me, and pretty much rocked my world! She viewed not walking me to the door completely opposite of how I'd viewed it! I saw it as a rejection, and she saw it as a deepening of our relationship. I was stunned. I seriously just sat there staring at her for a few minutes, and trying not to cry! My trust for her skyrocketed. It was amazing!

I had some amazing revelations in this session, and the whole range of emotions. I started out totally stressed, then went to laughing, then nervous, then stunned, then almost crying. At the end of the session, I felt drained, but really good. I told my T that I wished I could just sit in her office and hang out for another hour, but I knew I couldn't...I had to get back to work and so did she.