tree, thank you so much for responding. I was afraid I'd scare everyone away! I'm also glad you're not leaving PC; we need you here!! Your advice is good; I know we're always told to say "I love you" to those we care about every time we talk to them. I tell my kids and they tell me on the phone and in person, something I didn't do with my own parents until my father's last year or so.

My T is "into" mindfulness and I just got the book, Wherever You Go There You Are, upon her recommendation. I started it. We also do meditation and breathing at each session. I've never had a T like her before, and I've never practiced meditation or mindfulness before either. I had to stop yoga, but I liked it too. A lot of my problem is anxiety and worry about the future. My T wants me to live in the now, and even in therapy, be in the "now" with her and not read what I emailed previously.

It's hard for me, though. I am glad my T isn't afraid to talk about death with me. She makes it easy to talk about anything, from peeing, LOL, to death!