I've been thinking of this since my last post in this thread: I need to leave PC. I am not able to be positive for anyone right now, and all reaching out seems to do is hurt people I care about. Too much is occurring in my life for me to be able to affect any change, so something has to give.

I have to accept my life for what it is and realize that I don't have it as bad as many do. I have to isolate for a while to stop these patterns that keep replaying. I must seek a therapist as soon as I am financially able before/if I can return.

I wish everyone the best and wish that I could return all the kindnesses that have been given to me by everyone here. I am sorry. I wish you all the best. Goodbye.