I also laughed at the "lets poke him with a stick and see if he moves stage".

But in all seriousness you need communication. Whenever you are ready for that. But it takes TRUST for communication. So going from T to T is not effective.

If you don't appreciate him touching your shoulder you need to say it. If what he did at crisis hurt you, you need to say it. If his email with porn names effects you, you need to say it. If the girls looking like you effects you, then you need to say it. But like you said you're not "there" yet. You need trust before you can say it. And that takes awhile to build up. But don't run away from therapists unless they have seriously harmed you.

Like I said before therapists are not perfect. I have had to set mine straight a good many times when he does things I don't like. And if you let stuff slide in real life, then who better to practice on using your voice then a therapist? If they didn't mess up, then who would we practice on!?