this is only going to be a quick post as i don't have much time but i'm starting to really a bit spaced out and i keep on thinking about hurting myself so i thought i'd bet write something before things get too bad. It's funny, yesterday i was having a really good day but i had this feeling it wouldn't last. I mean i was hoping it would but now i'm finding i've slipped back down a bit. I know it's not the case, but sometimes i feel that if i just tried harder i could be fine and happy and not worried about anything. But i'm trying already, i just wish it wasn't such a damn slow process....it's like i take one step forwards, two backwards....