You may be exhibiting projection--taking the "adult" side of your personality and projecting it on someone else, leaving you acting with the childlike characteristics of your personality and further forcing the other person to act like the adult, which reinforces you acting like a child.... It's a vicious cycle that I think is best broken with help of a good therapist (you might want to consider a male, if this is where you project the most) who will recognize the projection you put on him but not act like you expect, forcing you out of the pattern.