I was in a relationship with a narcissist but lucky for me everytime he perceived me as doing something wrong he wouldn't talk to me for long periods of time so the relationship never went very far. It was also hard for me to accept that the guy I thought i was falling in love with really didn't have any respect for me even thouth he would say things that made it seem like he thought I was special and we were going to get married one day. I basically just had to remind myself t(hat it doesn't really matter what's in a man's heart what matters are his actions. I have to remind myself of that a lot. )I may be misunderstanding some of what you're saying so forgive me if my reply doesn't quite make sense. I think you should keep in contact with your friend and not make a big deal about your ex unless she brings him up first. If he ask you any questions about him just answer as honestly as possible.