(((Tao))) depression tells us lies. Yours is telling you the lies you are believing... "you're too young for this... there's no hope... you've tried everything... no friends...."

I do know you have no hope of your own. You can live on the hope others here have for you. (I know this personally...and from my T's hope for my life...)

When you say your T is no help, what does that mean?

You haven't tried everything, though you feel that way. And even if you had tried "everything" you haven't tried it long enough? "half your life" is not very long... in the span of things... the journey IS this... noone has an easy life.. .it's all about learning and trying and struggling...

You are up to it, look at that "half your life" as your strength. No, your life hasn't been easy... but it's not "you" it's your disease of depression.

Try and think that... you feel this way because it's the depression... it isn't a problem with YOU personally, but the depression...

I know you're tired of it all ((((tao)))) I know. Me too... but we can get through this, ok?

Use all the help you need to... try not to say triggering words or phrases to even the people on the hotline... you know what they are... let people help you... don't push them away...

ask for more help.. from your case worker etc. If you overwhelm your caseworker (show them they aren't qualified to give you ongoing therapy) then maybe they will call in professional help for you... keep after them...

You're worth it!